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What Happens When A Big Man Becomes A Big Baby
Was it really wrong of me to laugh at my big, strong husband when he came screeching out of my bedroom like a little school girl and stopped in front of me, demanding I to go clean up the mess my dog made while chewing a bone on the bed?
Was it really wrong to bowl over laughing when he got indignant when I told him to clean it up himself and he said he couldn’t because it was “EWWIIEEE.”
Was it really wrong of me to be snorting with laughter as I walked away (to ignore his request), mocking my large, manly, macho husband for his use of such a pansy ass word and his obvious disgust with what turned out to be just an itty bitty bit of dog drool and wet bone chunks on his pillow?
Since when did I become his maid, existing just to serve his every whimpy request? (Isn’t that why we had kids?)
I mean, really, who wears the pants around here?
January 2nd, 2008 at 9:46 am
Oh, I think we all know who wears the pants around there.
January 2nd, 2008 at 9:57 am
You aren’t seriously asking this question, are you?
January 2nd, 2008 at 10:26 am
Pansy ass word LOL that reminded me of Hugh Grant and “whoop see daisy” from Notting Hill.
January 2nd, 2008 at 10:30 am
You would be the wear-er of the pants ma’m!
January 2nd, 2008 at 10:34 am
As long as you are the one satisfying his “needs”, you wear the pants.
January 2nd, 2008 at 10:59 am
NO NO NO!
Women have kids so THEY can teach MEN to be better adults than their hubby is.
Men are the inspiration of children. Women get past the horny stage, which is why they say “I do”, and then they see what the hell it is they just made a lifetime commitment too. Talk about not reading the fine print. Then when women realize that THEY can never replace a mans mommy, they realize the only way out is to spend 18 years, more or less, in people purgatory having little rug rats, and teaching those ankle biters to grow up to be sane and sensible.
capisca?
LOL
January 2nd, 2008 at 11:18 am
My husband thinks the cat litter is gross and refuses to clean it out. I can’t wait to see how he manages a dirty diaper.
January 2nd, 2008 at 11:41 am
My husband, god bless him, handles cat litter, compost buckets, barf both feline and toddler… but blanches totally at the sight of runny poop. He was home with Isaac once and called me on my cell phone just to tell me the little one had the runs and there was poop in his shoes - like I was going to go home right then, or something.
It’s funny what will make strong men go EWWWIIEE, isn’t it?
January 2nd, 2008 at 12:15 pm
Ha!
Well, it’s obvious that he wears the pants, although probably only when the pants don’t have “eewiiee” doggy spittle on them.
January 2nd, 2008 at 12:26 pm
MB will catch cat prey and lift dead bodies, but if it’s just entrails, he won’t touch it.
He’s good with cat litter - but don’t like cat sick.
Good thing we never had children….
cq
January 2nd, 2008 at 1:12 pm
Now I’m remembering the first dirty diaper SB changed. Oh yes, cried like a baby yes he did.
January 2nd, 2008 at 1:35 pm
It’s good that there is a lot of laughter in your house. However it’s much more fun if nobody is wearing pants.
January 2nd, 2008 at 1:43 pm
He will clean it up himself and he will LIKE IT! Dammit!
January 2nd, 2008 at 1:59 pm
ewwwwie? He said that? He obviously abdicated the pants to you!
January 2nd, 2008 at 3:56 pm
Manly men. I love it when they have to clean up ewwwies and when they turn into whiny machines when they’re sick.
January 2nd, 2008 at 5:20 pm
This is precisely the reason I love to gross out my husband at every opportunity.
January 2nd, 2008 at 5:55 pm
It started with a small, stifled titter (can’t let the boys see I have baby-gated them into Mega’s room for some Mommy-free play time!), and grew into an all our howl. You, you would be the pants wear-er, my dear.
January 2nd, 2008 at 6:55 pm
He really said “EWWIIEEE”? Hee! Reminds me of my hubby when he sees a spider. I’m the one to collect it and throw it outside. He, on the other hand, runs around, tippy-toed with a tissue…! Happy New Year!!!
January 2nd, 2008 at 7:25 pm
Oh yes, that is what happens around here if I ask my husband to pick up the dog poo! Whatever.
The dude is a firefighter, you’d think a little poop would be no big deal . . .
January 2nd, 2008 at 8:16 pm
He he he. Leave some pretty pink nailpolish on his pillow…
Once, while killing a spider, the thing moved. My husband squealed like a little girl. I nearly peed I was laughing so hard. Apparently it was the spider that squealed.
Yeah right. You big girl.
January 2nd, 2008 at 8:25 pm
eww would be bad enough, but ewwiiee?
dude.
January 2nd, 2008 at 10:13 pm
You are most definitely the wearer of the pants — provided, that is, these pants survive future ice skating adventures!
January 3rd, 2008 at 2:50 am
On a fishing trip I was trying to catch some crayfish for bait, I was balancing myself on my knees with my ass higher than my head on an extremely round boulder with a flashlight in one hand and the other hand under water grabbing for the fast swimming little crayfish, just at that moment I flushed a duck out of the reeds, and the man that I love, the one I thought would save me in time of danger, screamed like a woman and started running for his life (all I heard was boot leather on rocks and a high pitched scream), he didn’t try to grab me and save me from what ever monster just ran on the surface of the water flapping its wings like crazy, he just ran screaming like a woman. I stood up and yelled at the top of my lungs “it’s a little bitty duck you chicken shit!” So much for macho men!
January 3rd, 2008 at 6:22 am
You baby. You in your hot ass pants
January 3rd, 2008 at 8:14 am
at what age *do* the kids become personal slaves? my oldest is five and a HUGE disappointment in that regard.
(hey Y
I missed ya!)
January 3rd, 2008 at 8:55 am
I think a better question would be, who is wearing the bloomers?
January 3rd, 2008 at 9:16 am
What is it about that? They don’t have any problem MAKING gross messes. Why can’t they clean them up?
Men. Can’t live with ‘em. Can’t shoot ‘em. But you can laugh at ‘em.
January 3rd, 2008 at 9:28 am
Well, of course you’re wearing the pants. Perhaps your hubby would benefit from a few days of high heels and an apron - together! That might even be an outfit to take to a bedroom.
January 3rd, 2008 at 11:16 am
Isn’t it obvious?!?!?! I mean…it’s obvious to everyone who reads this site that YOU, T, wears the pants in this relationship.
It’s why we love you!!!!!
January 3rd, 2008 at 2:17 pm
Just for my own future reference, would it have been better if your husband ha said, I can’t clean it up because that is some nasty foul shit, instead of saying ewwieee?
January 3rd, 2008 at 2:34 pm
I just found you (via life in the fishbowl) and omg, snorting coffee through my nose. I love this post but must confess the previous post, children with knives on their feet, made me laugh out loud.
Happy New Year.
Oh, and men just stay babies about this kind of stuff. Dog puke - yeah, totally my domain.
January 3rd, 2008 at 2:47 pm
Nope, not wrong at all. Laughter was absolutely the right thing to do…you should have rolled on the floor laughing though and complained of your sides hurting for that extra effect.
January 3rd, 2008 at 8:56 pm
But i beg to ask ’cause I read back quite a few posts….what DID he get you for xmas that trumped you?
January 3rd, 2008 at 9:52 pm
obviously he grew up with lots and lots of pets!
January 3rd, 2008 at 11:13 pm
You baby, nice hot pants.
January 5th, 2008 at 12:51 am
ROFL! You could just tell him that his behavior just lowered your sex drive a couple of points… maybe he’ll catch on