I’m about to do something I have never done before. I’m treading into unknown waters and hoping for the best. Having never been one to timidly dip my toes into the pool, I’m choosing to cannonball in and pray to heaven above that I don’t end up belly flopping.
(Because no matter how funny my kids think it is when I do that, there is just no joy getting the wind knocked out of you and having your boobs pushed up your nostrils. Just so you know.)
I’m taking a leave of absence from Redneck. There are some issues that need to be resolved and require my undivided attention. Issues such as school shopping. Which I have put off until the very last possible moment.
I figured since I’m not going to be around the blog for the next week, I may as well open up the doors to my kingdom and invite others to play basically do my work for me here at my blog.
In fact, I’ve declared this week, WIENERS WEEK AT REDNECK’S. All wieners, all the time. Because who doesn’t love a good wiener? Heh.
I emailed some of my testical-toting manly friends and asked begged and pleaded them to help a girl out. Hell, I admit it. I totally batted my eyelashes, wore a low cut shirt and a push up bra while I sent out the invites. This bitch ain’t too proud to beg.
Turns out, very few men can resist my whining flirtatious flattery . Heh.
I’m pleased to announce I’ve managed to charm five of my favourite daddy bloggers into rescuing this damsel in distress. Daddy bloggers don’t get enough lovin’ on the blogosphere and I hoped maybe you all would be so kind as to toss your virtual panties at their feet. I hear they like that sort of thing.
So a warm welcome and great big sloppy kisses to Backpacking Dad, Slicksumbich, Whit, Black Hockey Jesus and the daddy Dooce of them all, Dad Gone Mad.
Thanks guys. Have fun waving your willies around my place.
I’ll be back in a week to clean up the mess.
19 Comments
It’s totally going to smell like a jock strap when you get back, T…
So exciting, Can’t wait!!
Good luck! Hope you get everything taken care of and I can’t wait to see what the testosterone testicle men have to say while they run rampant through your blog
This ought to be damn interesting!
Looking forward to hearing what the guys will do on your blog!
hmmm…are we supposed to love em or hate em? i am so torn between loving testicles and such and feeling a need to stir some shit up and make their lives living mommy blogging hell…we’ll see how I feel this week.
Ou la la….love those waving willies.
When you get back, be ready to pick up the stray socks and beer cans, put the toliet seat down and good luck finding the remote.
My God! You are brave.
Who the hell are these guys?
Make sure they wipe around the seat and floor after they’ve peed and then killed 20 minutes flexing in the mirror.
Oh, I’m gonna miss you.
It’s wiener-palooza at my house. I look forward to reading the dudes.
That was flirting? Setting the dogs on me to drag me down and then while I’m cowering on the ground yelling “Write me a post, bitch!!!” does not count as flirting.
Oy. From the comments so far it is going to be a hell of a week around here.
Bring it on!
This should be fun…..ish. Can’t wait.
I am so heartbroken.
We’ll miss you but don’t worry about us we’ll be here waiting for you.
NOOOOOOOO! You leave us and put Shawn in charge of the kingdom? It’s going to be nothing but fencing and cheesy Burt Reynolds mustaches. NOOOOOOO!
Wow, that’s quite the lineup. You totally showed them your rack again, didn’t you?
Were you wearing pants when you asked for guest bloggers? Cuz that’s an impressive lineup!
Ohmigod. I’ve never read any of these guys before and here it is, Friday, and I am DYING laughing. At work. With my co-workers staring questioningly at me. I just read all 5 and now I need a fresh pair of unders b/c I think I peed my pants.
Great guest posts!